Sh*taficin: 24-hour silence support for acute oversharing

Sh*taficin was developed for the patient who has tried mindfulness, counting to ten, deleting the draft, and still somehow opened with “to be honest.”

Silence, scheduled

Our 24-hour quieting profile is designed for boardrooms, brunches, open-plan offices, and any environment where the phrase “one more thing” has already done enough damage.

May cause strategic nodding, thoughtful blinking, and sudden respect for the mute button.

Do not combine Sh*taficin with podcast microphones, reply-all threads, or relatives who say they are “just asking questions.” Your health — you problem!